Tag Archives: Jesus

“Time of Gethsemane”

10 Jun

We’re still undergoing difficult times for these couple of months… We’re still struggling in our financial meanwhile our baby is due soon on September.. Nothing else we can do other than giving our best effort and surrender to God…

 

Nevertheless God is still and always faithful. Monday this week I received God’s comfort and revelation from Matthew 26:36-46, when Jesus struggled and prayed in Gethsemane.

I have known this story before I was born again in the Lord, even since I was a kid, but this time these verses really touched me in a different way than before.

I was so touched and amazed by how focused Jesus was in pleasing the heart of God even sacrificing His own wills (and to the point of His death, and not for something He did either).

"Longing to Please God the Father"

He told James and John that night how His soul was so crushed with grief to the point of death (v.38) yet His own disciples didn’t really get what He truly felt that night; how anguished He was, they even fell asleep eventhough He had asked them to watch and pray with Him. More or less I could imagine how troubled and sad He was at that night, with noone to understand how He truly felt…

He prayed the same prayer for three times, before then He understood His will wasn’t God’s will… While Jesus was still on earth, He had a very intimate relationship with His Father, He knew exactly what pleases God’s heart and could discern which God’s wills or not… He could accept the truth that God wouldn’t set Him free from His betrayers…

He said in v.45-46, “Go ahead and sleep. Have your rest. But look – the time has come. The Son of Man is betrayed into the hand of sinners. Up, let’s be going. Look, my betrayer is here!”

He was finally ready and accepted “God’s cup” for Him…

 

After I read these that night and now everytime I ponder back on these verses, I felt somehow God is giving me comfort and desire to follow Jesus’ example, on how much He wanted me to please Him – not for His ego, but for my own goodness!

I still can’t figure out God’s plan behind all my trials, even last night I cried asking patience to endure ‘imperfectness’ in my life. But I can feel the Holy Spirit within me, pouring out a new desire to my heart to surrender and trust God wholly, to persevere and just focus on pleasing Him. All the imperfectness that I’m having now is PERFECT in God’s eyes because they are all according to His plan. His plans are higher than my own plans, and His plans are all the best and will only bring hope and future in my life.

Please pray for our (me & my husband) faith to be strengthen day-by-day, and not having negative view on what seems like ‘negative circumstances’… God bless and love you all readers :)

“My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from Me. Yet I want Your will to be done, not Mine” – Matthew 26:39

 

 

“Disappointment With God”

20 Sep

Taken from Philip Yancey “Disappointment with God”

Have you ever been disappointed with God? It’s hard to admit, I know. It seems somehow wrong. Yet after I wrote the book, Disappointment with God, a little over a year ago, I started getting letters, all kinds of letters from all kinds of people. Each of them told me in a different way, “I’ve been disappointed with God.” It’s a common experience, almost universal, among Christians. Many of them went on to tell me their stories. Some became disappointed with God because of a tragedy. The most common one was the loss of a child. At such a moment of pain they turn to God and say, “Why? Why would a loving Father allow something like this to happen to me?” Other people wrote and said, “There is no one specific thing on which I can pin down my feeling of disappointment, but the relationship I have with God sometimes seems very close and personal and other times He seems far away.”

There is a bumper sticker I have sometimes seen in church parking lots. It says, “If you feel far from God, guess who moved?” Some of these people said to me it seemed like God moved. Disappointment with God. If you have ever felt that, I start with an encouraging word. The word is you’re not alone. Not only have other Christians felt that same experience, but many of the people who wrote the Bible have experienced disappointment with God as well.

A lot of us turn to the Book of Psalm when we want comfort. If you really read those Psalms carefully, by my estimate about a third of them are written by disappointed people. They will call God to task. They will say, “I thought we had a deal, God. Why are these bad things happening? I followed your will and yet I am surrounded by enemies. My life is caving in. It’s not fair.” They look around them and say, “This world is not fair. Wicked people seem to be prospering while righteous people like me are suffering. It’s not so easy. Explain yourself, God.” About a third of the Psalms have something of that tone.

It is not just in the Psalms. There are other books like Jeremiah and Habakkuk in which disappointment with God is a major theme. There is one book in the Bible, however, where it is right at the center. That book is the Book of Job. Bible scholars say that Job may be the first book written in the Bible, the oldest book. I find it interesting that when God set down the word He wanted us to know about Him, He began with one of the hardest questions of all.

It’s not always big things that cause us to questions things like, “Is life unfair?” I find that often for me it is the petty things – when my car won’t get started. Maybe you have ten pounds you’ve been trying to lose for two years and you can never keep them off. For me as a writer, the most discouraging thing is when I work all day, or a couple of days, on an article and then through some computer foul up, I lose it and have to start all over. It’s at moments like this that I start thinking life is unfair.

When I got to the portion of Disappointment with God that dealt with the Book of Job, I decided to look around me and find the person I knew who was most like Job. I found such a person. He was a righteous man in the same sense that Job was righteous. He was a good man. He had been trained as a psychotherapist, but he gave up a lucrative practice and started to work in the inner-city among poor people. Yet after he did that, his life started to fall apart as well. The first thing that happened was that his wife came down with a case of breast cancer. She started taking chemotherapy treatments and that affected his whole family. She was always tired and often felt sick. Douglas, the man’s name, had to pick up a lot of work around the house. The spot of cancer spread and appeared on her lungs. Her life was seriously threatened and a new series of treatment started.

Douglas had to deal with that new situation. In the middle of his pain and in the middle of the suffering of their family, they were involved in a serious traffic accident. They weren’t doing anything wrong; they were driving down a road. A drunken driver crossed the median, and smashed into their car head on. Douglas’s twelve-year-old daughter went through the windshield and was badly lacerated in the face. His wife was also hurt. The worst injuries were to Douglas himself. Douglas hit his head on the dashboard. First, he had trouble with his vision. One of his eyes wouldn’t cooperate and he saw double. He couldn’t even walk down a set of stairs without stumbling. The worst thing to him was that he could no longer read. Douglas loved to read. I knew Douglas. I knew his story.

 

 

When I started to write about the Book of Job, I decided to interview Douglas. I called him up and scheduled an appointment. We met for breakfast. He told me some of the story. We sat and chatted for a while. After breakfast had been served I said, “Well, Douglas, I’m writing a book about disappointment with God. I thought of all the people I know you have the right to be disappointed with God, you’re right at the top of the list. Tell me, what would you say to people who are disappointed with God?” Douglas thought for a minute and stroked his beard. Finally he looked at me and said, “You know, Philip, I don’t think I’ve ever been disappointed with God.” This was a great shock to me. I was amazed. I had specifically chosen Douglas because I thought of all the people I knew, he was the one most likely to be disappointed, even angry at God, because of the unfairness he had seen.

I asked, “How can this be?”

He said to me, “You know, Philip, I learned a long time ago and especially through this accident not to confuse God with life. Is life unfair? You bet. My life has been unfair. What has happened to my wife, what has happened to my daughter, what has happened to me, it’s unfair. But I think God feels exactly the same way. I think He is grieved and hurt by what that drunk driver did as much as I am. Don’t confuse God with life.” He said, “As I read the Bible, especially the Old Testament, I notice that those people were able to separate the physical reality of their lives from the spiritual reality of their relationship with God.”

As we sat there together, we went through some of those people. We turned to a passage, for example, in Ezekiel where God tells about three of His very favorite people: Daniel, Noah and Job. Think about those three people. One of them spent the night with a bunch of lions; one of them lived through a huge flood that killed thousands of people and then, of course, there’s Job, the greatest example of unfairness in the Bible. Yet when God looks at those people, He says these are three of my favorites.

All three of them—Daniel, Noah, Job—and many others—Abraham, David, who wrote some of the Psalms—learned to have a relationship with God that didn’t depend on how healthy they were and how well their lives were going.

A Jewish theologian named Abraham Heschel once said of the Book of Job, “Job gained a faith that could never be shaken because he got it out of having been shaken.” That’s the kind of faith that these people seemed to have.

We sat there together going through so many of these stories from the Bible. Suddenly Douglas glanced down at his watch and said, “I’ve got to go. I’ll leave you with one last thought and that’s this. If you are ever tempted to confuse God with life, go back and read the story of Jesus, the story of God on Earth. Ask yourself how Jesus would have answered the question, is life unfair.” Just before he left Douglas said, “For me, the cross of Christ demolished for all time the idea that life is supposed to be fair.”

I took Douglas’ challenge. I went home and read the Gospels and I asked myself how Jesus would respond to that question, is life unfair? When Jesus was with a poor person or a sick person, He never said, “Well, that’s your lot in life. You have got to accept it.” He changed it. He healed that person.

When Jesus had a friend who died, He responded much like we do. He cried. He grieved. When Jesus faced pain and possible death, He was afraid, as you or I would be.

The guest last week on this program was Henri Nouwen. He tells a moving story from the country of Paraguay. It is about a doctor who cared very much for the poor people in his little village. He would often treat them free of charge. But others—the authorities, the police, the government in the village—didn’t like him. They didn’t like his politics. They thought he was stirring up foment among the poor people. He was too popular for them to take on, so instead they kidnaped his son. They took his son, arrested him, put him in a jail and tortured him. They tortured him too much and the son died.

When news of the son’s death spread throughout the village, they wanted to hold a huge demonstration march. They wanted to carry his body through the village and demonstrate to the media, to the newspapers, what had gone on. But, the father said, “No, I don’t want to do that. I just want a funeral in the church here in the village. We will show in our own way.”

When people arrived for the funeral, they had a surprise in store. The father had taken the body of the son just as he had found it in the prison cell on a blood-soaked, dirty mattress. Instead of being all dressed up in a nice suit in an expensive coffin, the corpse in that little village was naked, lying on this mattress covered with scars. It was the strongest protest imaginable. What that father did was put the injustices of his village on grotesque display.

Henri Nouwen goes on to ask, “Isn’t that what God did at Calvary? He spread out for the whole world to see the injustice of this world. The cross in one minute showed what kind of world we have—a world of violence, a world of cruelty, a world of injustice, and what kind of God we have, a God of sacrificial love who gives Himself for us.”


Is God unfair? It depends on how closely you relate God and life.
I challenge you not to confuse God with life. The question “Is God unfair?” is very different than the question, “If life unfair?” No one was exempt from tragedy, pain, disappointment. Job wasn’t. The other people in the Old Testament were not. Even God himself, when He came to earth, was not exempt from unfairness, from pain, from tragedy.

The story of the Gospel does not end there. If you want to find some disappointed people, read the stories of the disciples who were around Jesus when He died. They had waited and followed Him for three years. He was the hope of their world, but they were disappointed. When the time came, everyone of them—blustery old Peter, emotional John—left Him. They were afraid for their own lives. Life hadn’t worked out. They were disappointed people. That was Friday, Good Friday, the day that Jesus died. But that is not the end of this story.

The end of the story, of course, is on Sunday when those same people who were cowering in the shadows suddenly came out of hiding. They realized the story ends not with tragedy, but with Good News. When some of those same people, like Peter, sat down and wrote about suffering to suffering people, he had a wholly different tone. You read nothing of the questioning, of the doubts of a Job, or even of some of the Psalms, because Peter saw in person what God had done on Easter Sunday. He took the tragedy, the worst tragedy that could be imagined. He took the unfairness, the worst unfairness that could be imagined.

 

Job in the old Testament was a righteous man who suffered much. Jesus was a perfect man who suffered even more. Yet, God took that unfairness, that tragedy, and made it a great victory, a victory on which our whole faith rests. I believe that when the disciples wrote advice—men like Peter, who wrote to the Christians in Rome and other places, or the disciples who were in jail, or those who were being persecuted or tortured for their faith, like the doctor’s son in Paraguay—they wrote words like, “Rejoice in your suffering.” How can you rejoice in the unfairness that you see going on? If you read First Peter, I think the answer is clear. You can rejoice because Peter saw the darkness of Good Friday, but he also saw the brightness of Good Sunday—Easter Sunday. Peter believed because he had seen, he had felt in himself that the worst that can happen, the grossest unfairness, could be redeemed, could be made new, could be made to live.

Just when God seems most dead, He may be coming back to life. It certainly was so for the disciples. It may be for you. I love a sentence from the German theologian, Jurgen Moltmann. He said this, “God weeps with us so that we may one day laugh with him.” The disciples wept on Good Friday. They laughed on Easter Sunday. I believe, and my faith rests on that same pattern, that what He did on a cosmic scale at Calvary He is doing in a very small and personal scale in my life.

God weeps with us so that we may some day laugh with Him. The disciples wept on Good Friday. They laughed on Easter Sunday. So will we. It’s good to remember that we live out our days on earth, on the in-between day, on Saturday, in the midst of the unfairness, believing in Easter Sunday that is to come.

“Back to Basic” Vol. 2

21 Jun

Oh my gosh! Few minutes after I posted “Back to Basic” below, I continued again my reading of Darlene Zschech’s book “Extravagant Worship”, and this verse straightaway grabbed my attention:

1 John 4:10, “This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins”

Quickly I remember I asked God just minutes ago through my writing, “what is love most importantly?”

And God gave me the answer!!!

Love is about Jesus’ sacrifice for me at the cross!

Now, I still haven’t really understood the depth of the revelation I’ve just received… but you know what, I named my previous entry as “Back to Basic”, that is my church’s Winter Camp theme this year (next week, June 29-July 2). At first I didn’t really understand what they meant with “Back to Basic”, what is the basic, I thought? Then the video news played at church two weeks ago made me understand, the voice-over said, after several years we’ve become born-again Christians, our focus to Jesus and His cross may be shifted away to God’s blessings and the world’s attractions.. now’s time to back to the basic: Jesus and His cross, His sacrifice for us that has made us alive again at the first place!

Now I know the next step You want is for me NOT to focus on how can I love You more… but focus on Your love that was shown to me at the cross!

I’m so excited with this very in time revelation God shows me! I want more God!

I will receive more from the Winter Camp too, that means Back to Basic Vol. 3 will be coming soon! :)

“Back to Basic”

21 Jun

Last night before I slept the Lord spoke to me this, verses that I got from the sermon I heard in the previous hours:

“If anyone comes to Me, he must hate.. even his own life. Any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be My disciples” – Luke 14:26,33 <NIV>

“Any of you who does not forsake (renounce, surrender claim to, give up, say good-bye to) all that he has cannot be My disciple” <AMP>

The Message’s translation said this for the verse 33, “Simply put, if you’re not willing to take what is dearest to you, whether plans or people, and kiss it good-bye, you can’t be My disciple”

He put desire in my heart to really meditate these two verses after for so long I haven’t meditated anymore straightaway verses I got from sermons once I got home unless it was necessary (and that ‘necessary’ was very much lesser compared to my early walk as Jesus-lover five years ago…)

Give up everything, Lord?

Yes, EVERYTHING, Nat… Give up your control of money, time, relationship with your loved ones, hobbies, interests… Give up YOUR LIFE…

As I’m writing this my heart’s broken… Lord, when have I stopped loving You? I mean, really loving You?

Why do I love You with the same shallow love as years gone by? Has it gotten deeper? Has it become lesser? And what’s more important, is it even called as ‘love’?

Love that is burning, love that is truly adoring You,  love that is different with a simple gratitude of Your goodness… Love that enable me to give up everything into Your hands with a sincere heart? Love that put You in the highest place of my time, my money, my priorities, my plans, my loved ones?

Lord, save me… When can I love You differently? How can I know that I have loved You differently?

I don’t want to be trapped in the circle of religion… and to give it up eventually because of boredom… or to be living well but my spirit’s dying inside… to be a zombie…

Lord Jesus, help me… my heart’s broken… no matter how many commitments I’ve made they later end up with just empty words… Your ‘occasional’ touch to my heart or ‘revival’ has simply become my emotional toy in the end…

When can I truly see You as You are? as the “I Am”…?

I love You, Lord… Help me so it won’t become empty words… Help me to experience Your sweet reality…

R.I.P. My Dearest Friend, Renaldo Djojo (05/12/1981-06/03/2010)

10 Mar
~Taken from my Facebook Note~
R.I.P. My Dearest Friend, Renaldo Djojo (05/12/1981-06/03/2010)
 Mon at 11:47pm | Edit Note | Delete

It feels weird for me… Before I start writing this note, I was browsing through my older photo albums to find pictures where Renal was also there, because I believe there is plenty… and I am right… One by one with every pictures I can recall the moments captured by the photos… Now I become more convinced that I do not regret at all the fact that I like to take photographs whether for fun or for the sake of documenting a moment…
I can easily recall all the good memories as I’m seeing pictures of my friends where Renal was also in there… I also saw some pics from Friendster! After years not opening it now I have the reason to… For memory of the friendship… and for all of us in the pictures to also recall the sweet memories, once again…

Now I try to make this note not too long… for the people I tag in this note you have clearly known what happened to him… for those who accidentaly reading this note and don’t have any idea at all who Renal is and what happened to him, he’s my close friend (once in Melb too then went for good to Jakarta), a crazy, funny, like-to-bully guy, always late yet ‘a faithful driver’ (he often drove me home even late at midnight), a very carefree man whom I never really had heart-to-heart sharing in “an appropriate manner” (kl udah masuk curhat session tetep aja bahasanya ngasal… so typical of him).. Surely I & him weren’t the ‘best friend ever’, but we were close and we often hung out together (with the rest of other bullying guys)… Again, we weren’t the best friend ever yet it was surely always fun to hang out with him…

On afternoon March 6 I received a phone call from a friend who was also very shocked with the news of his sudden death, both of us really thought (and hoped…) it wasn’t true and some sick people just made a bad joke… But it is not… Renal was found dead in the morning of March 6th 2010 on his bed… Hours before he just spent his night at Java Jazz Fest and recently just gone back from his trip in Singapore, a trip that I believe really uplifted his faith in Jesus to a stronger level, it’s a prayer convocation, not just a holiday, where he received God’s heavy anointing…

It wasn’t a good night for him… It was a good-bye…..

With his death (I still feel so weird writing that word… ‘death’..), God has used it to open my eyes to many challenging truth… This is the first time ever for me to have my close friend died… Whenever my mind’s brought back again to the truth the Renal who has just died not only ‘Renal’ but ‘Renal, my friend, whom I totally know!’ really makes my heart hurt…! I am sure everyone esp those who were tagged feel the same in the big pic… This fact surely hits us hard…

I totally realize (although the fact is actually already right out there) when I die I won’t bring a single thing! Not even my beloved gadgets (say, my BB which I really treasure), not any single clothes, bags, shoes, accessories, books bla bla bla….. NOT A THING! When God calls me I will be just “PUFFF!”, my breathe’s taken, I’m gone…! If I’m lucky I’d have chance to say goodbye to my loved ones, if not then, well… what they will remember is my last words I spoke to them, last activites we spend together, and what about if the words and deeds aren’t a good one…..? No other chance to say sorry and mend it…

I’ve just realized what it means to “live every single day to the fullest”, “live the day as if it was your last”, “love your neighbour as you love yourselves”….

I’ve just realized even my dreams and my passions in the Lord will mean nothing! All’s left is the fruits!

I remember in Winter Camp 2007 Renal got prophesied by Diane Manusama that he’d be a preacher… I was excited to hear that and continued to tease him for some time because he kept saying ‘no it won’t happen’ and that he didn’t want to be a preacher anyway… Now we see that Renal is not a preacher who stands on the pulpit… But what’s left is the fruits and the seeds for every God’s words he sowed wherever he was!

If my dream is to be a writer and to be God’s evangelist, and when I die I still not publish any single book – what can I do? I cannot demand from God ‘why don’t You let my dream be made true?’

 

Dreams for things in the world even desires in God will be vanished. YET Dream to be forever with Jesus one day will not, IF I keep holding on to my saving faith by God’s grace……. If I die that dream, that passion ,even be made true..!

Also, with problems. Problems are momentary only. Now I get a much better understanding of that famous Christian saying, ” focus on God, He’s much bigger than your problem”!
When I die the problems will be gone, anyway. They will not reach me where I will be. This doesn’t teach me to be careless in handling my problems, but to focus on God’s strength which will enable me to go pass it through with the best solution if I follow His ways and not rely on my own understanding! Problems aren’t an end of everything, they are just tools for our faith to be strecthed to a new capacity!

Relationships – these are also momentary. Hard, cold fact: one day our loved ones will not be on this earth anymore (that’s the ‘soft words’ because truly I don’t like the other word – “dead”)… Ecclesiastes says there is time for everything… It is so true…
Last night I was terrified with fear of losing my loved ones, I cried in tears… Yet I know that is not the main message that God wanted to give me… God never put unhealthy fear in our life! Through this He reminds me to treasure every people He has put in my life, in my surroundings!
Cherish every moment… Treasure every opportunity for being able to spend time together…
Fights are totally unnecessary! I’ve realized how selfish and childish I was when I got into fights with my bf, for example… when on the other side I could always speak and sort out the matter in a more gentle and respective manner… Every fight, anger, disputes, and hatred are totally insignificant…

 

Dreams, Problems, Relationships will all pass away… They are NOT the unbreakable one… Only God’s Kingdom and His words that aren’t breakable…

“Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom which cannot be shaken, let us have grace, by which we may serve God acceptably with reverance and godly fear” ~ Hebrews 12:28~

“All flesh is as grass,
and all the glory of man as the flower of the grass.
The grass withers, and its flower falls away.
But the word of the Lord endures forever” ~ 1 Peter 1:24-25~

So will I hold on tight to things that I know one day I will lose it? Will they serve to be my idols in this world, or let God alone be in the highest place in my heart?

That is my desire for the Holy Spirit and God’s grace to help me, to say NO I won’t hold them too tight, I want to live my life and love His blessings wisely (not taking them for granted, not forsaking them, yet not treating them as idols), and let Jesus serves the highest place in my life… Without ability from Him I will not be able to finish my race of faith in victory, I am really convicted with this truth…

This feels weird, but I have to thank God through Renal’s death I, we, have learnt some valuable lessons about life…I can see life from a changed perspective… And I truly hope will bring me a changed life… The lessons cost dearly indeed, our beloved friend…

BUT guess what… this evening when I spend time with God in Menado (prayer meeting at church), Holy Spirit said these words to me, that I will serve as a closing to my note……

“If through Renal’d death you can see life differently now, how much more through JESUS’ DEATH your life should be transformed…!!!

This very wowed me!!!!

If Renal’s death can grab my heart so deeply, how much more Jesus’!!!!!

I’ll leave this note as it is…. I will not elaborate more…

 

Don’t forget Renal and the life lessons he has taught us through his death, forget the pain of losing him…

Remember always living a new, transformed life through Jesus’ death AND ressurection…!!!

We will all miss you Nal… Enjoy eternity in God’s presence!!! Til’ we listen to your jokes again when we shall meet in heaven…. :’)

Before the year ends…

15 Dec

Waking up at my friend’s house in Caroline Spring, my heart feels better and filled with peace… Simply peace… Then I wrote these verses from 1 John 2:

“My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father – Jesus Christ, the Righteous One.

He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world

Thank You Jesus You are always there with me… It is my desire to know You more, to believe in You more, to love You more… To understand the love language of God which is shown through His own Son, Jesus Christ… Not from worldly blessings… Lord, renew my mind so that I think more of You, more of the eternal value rather than temporary things in this world…

Surprise me before the year ends :)

“Digging Wells That Won’t Hold Water!”

12 Dec
I took this from The Vine Saturday Dec 12nd 09′s devotional:
 
My people have… dug… cisterns… that cannot hold water.
Jeremiah 2:13 NIV
 
Do you feel like there’s something missing in your life? Are you running from place to place and person to person trying to find it? Until you put God at the centre of your life, you’ll keep digging ‘cisterns… that cannot hold water.’

We all want to be loved and feel successful, so we look to our jobs or to others for a sense of fulfillment. But by expecting a person or a pay cheque to do what only God can, we keep coming up short. ‘Cursed is the… one who depends on mere humans… he’s like a tumbleweed… rootless and aimless… But blessed is the man who trusts… God… They’re like trees… putting down roots near… rivers… calm through droughts, bearing… fruit every season’ (Jeremiah 17:5-8 TM)

Fulfillment doesn’t come from having ‘the right people’ in your life, or more money, prestige and accomplishments. A larger house won’t do it; you’ll just have more to clean. The latest car won’t do it; you’ll just end up with bigger payments. A job promotion won’t do it; you’ll just have more stress and longer hours. Yes, you’ll make more money, but after taxes and buying what you need to maintain your new image, you’ll be back to square one. At the end of a lifetime spent ‘striving after [the] wind… ‘ (Ecclesiastes 2:11 NAS). Solomon said, ‘Everything… can be put into a few words: Respect and obey [honour and put your trust in] God! This is what life is all about’ (Ecclesiastes 12:13 CEV). The One you’re looking for today has been there all along, and He’s ready to meet you at the point of your need. You just have to invite Him in!

 

Ps: I’ll post my stories from Nimbin Mission Trip soon :)

Imagine…

11 Jun

Tonight in my heart I really enjoy His love… I cannot describe the feeling wholly by words… Feels like it wants to explode… Make me wanna shout out “I Love You Lord! I Love You Lord!”, and even that’s not enough… Still I am speechless…

How He is so great in my life… I never knew that my life would be so beautiful with Him in it… I follow Him by faith… Yet all the experiences are real to me… He takes me to a ride that is so enjoyable… so joyful, so beautiful…

What if I met You in person, God… I would hug You so tight… I would laugh out loud with You… I would cry joyful tears… I would tell You stories, all about my feeling… I would run with You together near the beach… as I watched You with Your loving eyes… as You spoke to me with calming voice…

God, how I miss the time to meet You in person… I know I am not perfect to qualify the eternal life spent with You… Yet Your love has made me as “qualified”… How could I say thank you…?

 

I can only imagine what it will be like

When I walk by Your side

I can only imagine what my eyes will see

When Your face is looking at me

Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel

Will I dance for You Jesus or in awe of You be still

Imagine, I can only imagine

 

I can only imagine all the creations bowed down

The whole universe saying Your name out loud

I can only imagine all our broken lives

Ressurected in the healing light

Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel

Will I dance for You Jesus or in awe of You be still

Will I stand in Your presence or to my knees will I fall

Will I sing Hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all

I can only imagine, I can only imagine

 

Surrounded by forgiveness, what will my heart feel

Will I dance for You Jesus or in awe of You be still

Will I stand in Your presence or to my knees will I fall

Will I sing Hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all

I can only imagine

Just imagine

I can only imagine

This is one of my favorite songs ever… It describes truly my heart at the moment… The longing heart to meet Him…

I love You, Jesus… Keep touching my heart with Your love, keep making me falling in love with You for my whole life… Because without it I am nothing, Lord… Without it I am lost…

Praise God… ’til Maranatha…

“7 Pounds” reminds me with…

31 Jan

Seven names. Seven Stangers. One secret.

7-pounds1I’ve finally watched “7 Pounds” movie just now. I’ve read the movie preview in a magazine last month, was interested with the storyline and been waiting for this movie to come out in Indonesia’s cinemas.

My bf had been a spoiler to what the story really is since he has come to watch it first in Melbourne few weeks ago (yeah rite grrrr…huehehehe :P ) and he’s told me it is a good movie and has a very good moral story behind it. My other friend two weeks ago also told me he’s watched it through dvd (bajakan pastinya krn blm keluar di bioskop Indo, ehem ehem..hahaha.. xP) and really suggested me to watch it as well.

 

Few hours ago I was actually planning to watch “Mamamia”, borrowing it from my brother. Then when I flick through his dvd collections, I was suprised to find he actually has bought 7 Pounds dvd too! hahaha… Trying to decide between Mamamia and 7 Pounds, I finally choose the later one.

Usually I don’t want to watch ‘heavy and deep movies’ alone. I prefer the funny, romantic comedy or any chick flick movies (tp jg jgn yg cheesy), cos sometimes I think of the movies too seriously hence affecting my mood afterwards (if it’s a sad movie nanti bs ke-bawa2 sedihnya hahaha.. :P ).

But well, tonight I just decide to choose the 7 Pounds deh, since I was so curious to really follow what the story and the acting instead of just satisfied with what my bf told me over the phone hahaha…

And friends, I can recommend you also to watch it! It is a really good movie, and Will Smith acted so well (like most of his movies for me personally ;) If I may give you just a glimpse of the story (don’t worry I won’t be a movie spoiler like someone who was hihihi :P ).

 

Will Smith played as a tax collector name Ben Thomas. He has suffered a trauma, a life-changing experience (not a good one of course since I mention the word of “trauma) – I won’t tell you what was going on, you just watch it hehe. Then after that he just committed to do something good to 7 people he chose by his own will. Not just something good, but I call it as a sacrifice for what he would do to each of those 7 people.

Now I won’t tell you either what he did, how the story ended, why it has to be “7″.  I can feel the atmosphere of the movie most of the times surrounded by gloominess since in the beginning (well it means he acted really well, during the movie my mood kok jd agak2 gloomy jg jdnya yah..hueee… I just felt as if I could feel his suffering, his sadness and depression.. knp g kl nonton kok serius banget yah… hahahaha :P ). As the movie continued the emotion got built up… Alurnya bagus sih, timeline-nya kuat. Dimulai dr adegan “present” trus backflash, di tengah2nya ada potongan adegan-adegan yg dr waktu sblmnya lagi (if I learn smt about movie making I should have known what to call gaya cerita di film yg tipe kaya gini, sayangnya tdk, jd semoga anda bs mengerti with what I describe at the above t’utama kalo yg udah nonton filmnya huehehe), klimaksnya pun jg well presented.

 

Well, if what my bf learn from this movie is about how to be a blessing to all people around us as much as we can (like Paul said in Galatians 6:10 “Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who beloong to the family of believers”), for me suprisingly in one specific scene towards the end of the movie, my heart suddenly said to myself, “that is what Jesus has done to you too“……

If I may summarize the story into one word, that would be a SACRIFICE. What Ben did to all of those 7 people cost him his life… but he still did it (the reason may not be partly right because.., arghhhh, you just watch it ok when it comes out in Indo, for those who have must get what I mean :P ). All of those 7 people  who still continue to live (errr… have I implied he will be dead in this movie…? ups, hahahaha :P ) must have always remembered what they can enjoy now and how they would miss the beauty of life if it wasn’t because the sacrifice of Ben….

 

The same also happen to me… I wouldn’t be able to live a free life like I do now if Jesus didn’t at the first place sacrifice Himself as the atonement of my sins! I should had still live in darkness, but He brought me into light and life. I should had deserved the eternal punishment yet He saved me from the real death.

Ephesians 2:3b-8

“…Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath. But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions – it is by grace you have been saved.

And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with Him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages He might show the incomparable riches of His grace, expressed in His kindness to us in Christ Jesus.

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God”.

 

It is a gift. Just like Ben picked randomly 7 people who deserved what the next thing he would do to each of them, even better, God choose ALL of us to receive the gift of salvation, free, although we do not deserve it!

Some of of those 7 people at first rejected what Ben would like to do to him/her, some of them rejected the goodness he about to do. Yet eventually when they did not know what to do anymore with their life problem and to whom they should run to, they called Ben and agreed to receive his help.

The same also applies to us. Some of us may be proudly said, “No thanks God, You are nice, but I am ok with myself, really, thanks”.. or “Why do You even care to me?!! What You can do anyway?!!!”….

or, “OK I know You about to do good things for me, but surely there must be something behind it that I need to repay, right? I don’t think I can, so better not at the first place for me to receive You in my life, I don’t know what will come next, maybe You will put too many burdens and restrictions over my life that would make me cannotenjoy my life like how it was supposed to be”……

 

Good news, there isn’t any ‘catch’ behind it. As I said, it is a gift. We do not need to repay. It is free (see the verses I wrote from Ephesians at above), because it is by grace. And why God cares for us? Why He has to spend energy to love human like us? Because He was the one who created each one of us at the first place!

Don’t you think you will love something very much that you create by your own? And what makes you think that God won’t do the same? Even God created us by His own image (Genesis 1:27)! We did not just self existed or worse, originated from monkeys??? Come on! *geleng-geleng… hehehe…

 

And also, life of a Christian isn’t always easy, the problem we face are just the same with everyone else, He never promised us an easy path anyway. In fact, He said to us to enter the narrow gate instead of the wide, easy one! But if what God only meant was to give us more burdens by such “rules” we suddenly have once we are a Christian, why He did even care to promise us joy, abundance of blessing, protection, guidance, love, peace, help in time of need and soo many others in the Bible a.k.a. His own words?!

Why Jesus even bothered to say to the crowd, “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28)?

He must’ve loved us so much! So much that He gave His own life for us so we can continue to live, continue to live remembering what He has done for us with our praise and thanksgiving hearts!

 

I am just so thankful that He reminds me again what He has done in my life through this movie. Not to ask me to repay or ‘work harder to do good even more’, but simply just to remind me how much He has loved me all of these times, how much He wants me to live my life to the fullest, how much He wants me to share it to the people surround me too.

Thank You Lord, just a perfect time tonight for tomorrow I will celebrate Holy Communion at my church….

 

(Originally posted at http://crunchynat.wordpress.com/)

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