“What I See, Hear & Experience at BIC Winter Camp 2010″ :)))

I wrote this last week’s Saturday in my Facebook notes

Awesome God!

OK!! I can’t wait to write this note and share it to all of you! I’ve been thinking what to write since last night, there are so much but I’m just gonna try to write it as short, sharp, and clear as I could. I hope this note will be a blessing for you as the Holy Spirit reveals His words regardless your life situations that may be different than mine

Before I came to the camp I said to God I don’t want any emotional play, I just want to taste and see that God is real, and I want to get His special words and guidance esp before I’m going back to Indo end of this month (how fast!)

The theme is “Back to Basic”, and I thought the speakers (Ko Dan, my pastor & Ps. Mark McLendon – a really funny guy for sure!) would discuss about “Jesus & His sacrifice at the cross” (I thought that was the basic of Christianity), instead they discussed about what is life, our destiny, our purpose and calling, eternal life, and Kingdom of God! (so deeppp )

First day and night I didn’t get much, I was too sleepy to listen to the sermons! I accidentaly slept when I was writing *upsss… first time happened (the memory will last in my ‘unbalanced writing’ in my 365 notebook )
Then on second day session 4, Ko Dan had an altar call, for those who were willing and ready to do God’s calling in our life. I knew God’s calling in my life as the big picture (to bring lost souls in my family & community through any ways), but I didn’t know the exact details of the puzzle, yet.
When KD anointed me with the oil, I felt a deep pressure in my heart, I couldn’t hold it I just cried and cried as KD spoke to me simple words,

“Just follow Me, I will lead you”

As simple as that but I knew God Himself was speaking those words to me through KD!
You know when God speaks, He doesn’t need many words, simple words will always burn my heart and soul! And this has become my rhema (God’s spoken words for me, me only!)
I cried and cried even after I went back to my seat, my heart said at that time, “God, nobody ever loved me the way You do!” (I actually said it to God in Indo, I feel it is more intimate, “Tuhan, aku ga pernah dikasihi seperti ini!! Seumur hidup aku ga pernah ngerasaiin dikasihi seperti ini!Hanya Engkau yg mengasihi aku THIS much!“)
I just felt God’s love so deep, I couldn’t even describe how deep, how great His love is! God’s love is just indescribeable, it can only be experienced and to be enjoyed…

Then Holy Spirit spoke to me, He said, “Nat, too many times you only use your physical eyes in seeing things. If you want to follow Me, you have to see by faith!”

I kept thinking, from many words that God could speak, He instead spoke to me, “Just follow Me”… That is such an assurance! Holy Spirit asked me rhetorically, “is it hard to just follow?”…. No, it’s not hard, Lord… Just following is never hard! It’s supposed to be not hard, it MUST be easy! Especially if following Someone whose wisdom as great as Yours!

Then at night there was a ‘soaking’ session by Ps. Mark (he also had that session when I joined the 2007 Winter Camp “Undivided Heart”), it was time to just sit and be soaked by God’s presence and love.
I was expecting God’s touch and the manifestation of His Holy Spirit, but I felt nothing.
I didn’t cry at all, I was just there praying, speaking to God.
To my amaze, this time I didn’t get disappointed at all to not experience His manifestations (while some were crying, jumping, and laughing). I knew He was there, He is real, and I knew as a good Father He won’t neglect His children who draw near to Him. I said to Him, “Lord, I know if You want to touch me You can do it anywhere, anytime You want. I’m just gonna wait, touch me at Your perfect time”
Also the next day, at our last session, I didn’t feel anything. Yet once again I wasn’t disappointed. What other signs could I ask if His Spirit within me has testified to my spirit and soul that God is real?

I might get disappointed if this happened to me some years ago. Yet, apparently God has brought me to a higher level of faith! Therefore I am rejoicing!!
I just knew He is there and I just believe He never neglect me, not even once!

At last session though, I received another rhema from God, it is a word of “spiritual destiny”
Ps. Mark clearly said, “Your spiritual destiny isn’t determined by what kind of job or work you do”

I was really touched by the word of ‘spiritual’! I never know that the ‘destiny’ that God meant for me isn’t the kind of ‘destiny’ that is in my human mind! I said to myself, “see, once again you judge things by worldly view”!
I thought my destiny, my calling was related to more a kind of job, but it didn’t!

From the first day Ps. Mark had mentioned that our identity is “Son of God”. Jesus died for us to make us God’s children, that’s the purpose of His redemption plan (read Galatians 4:5 if you don’t believe me: “God sent Him (Jesus) to buy freedom for us who were slaves to the law, so that He could adopt us as His very own children“)
As God’s children, our home is not in this world!
The life we’re having on earth is just temporary, one day it will end… Our destination is HEAVEN, to be with Jesus Christ! And if you think Heaven is only about “fence made from gold, happiness, all costly stones, angel’s flying everywhere”, well, that is still too shalow, and once again that is worldly definition of heaven! KD said, if that kind of happiness that the Heaven only offers, how long you’d think you would not get bored? Maybe within a week you’d said, “I wish I bring my magazine!”

Heaven is just too great to be described and imagined! Good news is, God wants us to feel that heaven while we’re still on this earth!
I know I have to read again Jesus’ teaching about Kingdom of God in the Gospel, because Kingdom of God is about principles. That’s why we can experience the reality of God’s kingdom while we’re still on this earth, IF we practice its principle as our way of thinking and living!

Jesus has taught us (to name a few) to be a forgiver (forgive seventy times seven), to be a giver (give and it will be given to you, the measure you use will be used unto you), and to be a man full of love (love and bless your enemy). By adopting and acting out these principles in our daily life, we can experience God’s power and overflowing joy in our daily life!

And by knowing that our destination is heaven, we will think really wisely of things that we want. We will ask not only ‘how to get what we want” but also more importantly “WHY do we want what we want?”

If we want to chase that certain career position, WHY? If we want certain things to posses, WHY? If we want certain relationships, WHY?

Because many (if not most) things we want, we will not bring it with us to heaven! They are all TEMPORARY!

So be wise in setting our values and life priorities.

KD said it does’t mean we can’t do or have what we want on this earth, but we should use temporal things (things that we have in this world) as a mean to get the eternal things!
Our skills, talents, career, work, material, posessions, family, husband/wife, boyfriend/girlfriend, friends, hobbies – they are ALL will discontinue one day! We cannot keep those!
But we can use these to achieve things that we eventually can keep when we die, we can use these to add value to the salvation that we’ve received from Jesus!

Don’t be afraid to surrender these things we have in this world, “We will never lose whatever we release to Jesus, but we will lose whatever things we keep from Jesus” – KD

So this is my destiny in living!
My point-of-destination is heaven, earth is just a transit. God has given me a destiny to be His own child, to live the principles of Kingdom of God while I am still on this earth, through anything that He has entrusted me (the temporal things)!

Indeed, I am so thankful for all of these revelations!
I’ve always known I can be ‘more’ than I am now. I can be more intimate with Christ, I would be able to know more what’s in God’s heart, and most importantly not only knowing, but to have a heart that is more like His, to be more Christ-centered than self-centered…

By the way, the place of this Winter Camp, Grampian, was the first place I also had when I first joined Winter Camp in 2005. Five years surely went very fast. At that time I knew very little about Christ (now is also still little because His characters are too deep to be experienced, it takes my whole life!), but I am so amazed by how God is faithful to bring me to this point!
So when I was on my way home in bus, I wonder what would I be in the next five years?
I don’t want to be the same! I want my life to be changed!
I truly want to live the way God has destined me! I truly want to be God’s true worshipper!

I believe He is able as He has given me the power to obey and please Him (that is His promise in Philippians 2:13, “For God is working in me, giving me the desire to obey Him and the power to do what pleases Him”)

What should I do now?

“Just follow Him. He will lead me”

God bless all of you my beloved friends

Are You Religious?

Religious is the adjective word of religion, which means “to acquire a deep conviction of the validity of religious beliefs and practices” (Dictionary.com)

Going to church, praying at church or at home, doing good to the poor are among few which are included to a description of someone being religious. He/she must have a deep conviction for the reasons doing the practices (I don’t include those who don’t even ‘do these religious things’).

Any other religion of course can alter the way they describe themselves as being religious of course, for example, praying regulary at the appointed times five times a day, burning insence and pray to god out of reverance manner, going to mosque/temple/else, donate to orphans, there are still many ways of other religions’ practices that I’m not familiar with!

The issue I want to bring out here is, do you really know Whom you’re worshipping? “Know”, as in knowing your God as you know your best friends?

The message in Acts 17 when Paul went to Athena rebuked my heart yesterday also today when I reread it again. There were so many gods there built in the form of statues, they even had one god called as “the unknown god”!!?

Then Paul exhorted them by saying, “…in every way you are very religious…. (but) you are ignorant of the very thing you worship”

They didn’t even know whom they worshipped, they labelled their handmade god by the name of ‘the unknown god’!

This message has rebuked me first of all and urged me to check my heart, “Have I become religious yet ignoring Jesus whom I worship?”

I said in my heart please draw this away from me, Lord! This is something that I truly don’t want, and forgive me if from time to time I have done this mistake!

Have I done my religious practices including my ministry requirements at church yet my heart and my soul aren’t thirsty anymore after Him?

I asked God forgiveness this morning, when I realized for these days I may have focused on ‘to get things right’ rather than ‘to get my relationship with Christ right (more intimate)’!

My dad’s salvation, my family issues, my wedding & future planning, my business – these things about ‘me, myself, and I’ have clouded my mind!

As I wrote in my previous entry, even though salvation of my dad and other people I love is urgent and crucial (and not about ‘me, myself, & I’), yet this is not the most important thing in my relationship with Christ!

Holy Spirit reminded and rebuked me last night and once again this morning, not to get my focus shifted from the Lord Himself! Praying and asking God to lead and guide me in making every steps right is still not the most important thing!

The most important thing is to know Christ wholeheartedly, to get intimate with Him, so one day my goal is to say what Paul said out of his deep conviction, gratitude, and love toward Christ,

“I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him… I want to know Christ – yes, to know the power of His ressurection and participation in His sufferings, becoming like Him in His death… One thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward THE GOAL TO WIN THE PRIZE for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Phil 3:8-14)

The “prize to win” is NOT the blessings on this earth that I can only enjoy temporarily!!!

One day I shall hug You like this, Lord...

The prize is Jesus Himself!!!

I can enjoy Him NOW on this earth through close & deep fellowship with His Holy Spirit within me, out of my weaknessed God will bring me from glory to glory just as He promised, until I see the perfection one day when I shall join Christ in His heavenly kingdom…

More than a question of “Are You Religious?”, I must ask myself from time to time, “Are You In Love With Christ?”

Am I falling head over heels for Christ?!!

O Lord, Help me to desire You more out of anything else… Let this quest to loving You more and more become ‘my greatest struggle and burden’ more than any other struggles that the world brings…

Because I know the prize is so much worth it, prize that is eternal, everlasting, never-ending… forever and ever with You, Lord…

Lord, I know even after I pray this prayer to make me love You more, I still couldn’t love You the way I want to… But I want, Lord… I don’t want to give up in loving You, because You have first loved me with Your unconditional love… Show me the impossible through Your Holy Spirit’s works God…

Happy New Year 2010 !!!

~Tahun pemulihan dan kelimpahan!

Tahun penggenapan atas penantian dan harapan! ~

Happy New Year all!

Aku lg ga bs banyak update ini blog.. cuma mau share singkat aja (hopefully dlm wkt singkat ini lmyn byk yg bs aku tulis hehe)…

Pas di penghujung taon 2009 kmrn, hari2 terakhirnya malahan ibarat sinetron tegang abisss… tp ga terduga banget hbs itu langsung ada breakthrough yg surprising banget! Apa yg aku ga pikirin malahan Tuhan ijinkan terjadi buat jd biggest surprise at the end of the year! Seneng banget pastinya

Stlh itu sempet bingung sih krn visi dan impian yg aku brasa dr Tuhan semuanya mandeg di tengah2 (ada dua sih sbnrnya yg paling utama, yg satu lagi puji Tuhan banget Tuhan udah mulai kasih jalan dan buka pintu2 yg sblmnya tertutup, Hallelujah!).. Nah yg dua ini menyangkut soal impian aku in publishing a book, n jg to have my own business…

Utk yg kedua sampe saat ini msh bingung kelanjutannya gimana… Msh ada major challenge yg blm terpecahkan solusinya… Aku sempet meragukan sih rncn Tuhan… Aku bingung, rasanya dr awal udah yg bener2 didoaiin dan direncanaiin, n slama ini jalan2nya smua dibukakan dgn mudah… Kok skrg di tengah2 stlh udah berjln mayan jauh jd ada hambatan gini.. Apa berarti ini bukan rencana Tuhan? Apa berarti wkt itu aku salah ngerti maunya Tuhan?

Tp ada bbrp pelajaran yg aku dpt dr ini semua sampai saat ini…

Yg pertama, aku bljr utk jd lebih humble lg… Sungguh sematang apapun perencanaan kita tp kl Tuhan berencana lain, dlm sekejap pun Tuhan bisa mengambil atau merubahnya… Trs apakah jd bikin aku takut berencana? Sempet sih. Aku jd “was2″, takut salah bikin rencana apalagi dlm ambil keputusannya… Tp stlh itu imanku dikuatkan, aku diingetin kalo God is in control in ANY situation! Keinget jg firmanNya di Roma 8:28… “Tuhan berkerja dlm SEGALA SESUATU utk menghasilkan kebaikan bagi mrk yg mengasihiNya”… Segala sesuatu b’arti di saat lembah kekelaman sekalipun jg t’msk donk? Iya! … Emang butuh pandangan yg baru, pandangannya Tuhan, buat bs lbh mengerti situasi yg sdg kita hadapi saat ini. Jd ya berencana tetaplah berencana.. “Fail to plan is plan to fail” gitu sih ada quote yg blg…

Yg kedua, bikin nambah iman dan kepercayaan aku sama Tuhan… Tambah bergantung sama Dia n ga andalkan diri sndr atau manusia lain…

Tepat seminggu yg lalu Tuhan ksh aku ayat di Yesaya 40:27-31… Dr situ aku ngerti isi hatinya Tuhan utk aku saat itu, yaitu hanya “menanti-nantikan Dia” saja! Ajaib loh besoknya dpt email renungan dr greja aku yg di Indo, ayat nas-nya jg dr Yesaya 40:31! Ya udah aku smakin ngerti kl memang itu yg Tuhan mau.. Just wait unto Him.. and menariknya, kl org disuruh nunggu org lain kan biasa yg ada malah jd cape, bosen, bete… tp di Alkitab blg org yg me-nanti2kan Tuhan itu bakal dpt kekuatan baru loh malahan! Apa itu ga menentang paradigmanya dunia tuh?!

Nahh.. ajaibnya lg, td pagi lwt suatu kejadian yg juga simple and natural banget tp kok somehow ‘supernatural’ jg, aku ktemu ayat di Yesaya 30:18 yg bunyinya gini,

“Sebab itu Tuhan menanti-nantikan saatnya hendak menunjukkan kasihNya kpd kamu;

sebab itu Ia bangkit hendak menyayangi kamu.

Sebab Tuhan adlh Allah yg adil;

Berbahagialah semua org yg menanti-nantikan Dia!”

Lagi2 Tuhan ingetin utk tetap setia me-nanti2kan Dia.. Aku serasa lg dlm perjalanan ngumpulin puzzle pieces satu demi satu deh… Saat ini aku cm bs jalanin apa yg jd bagianku yg Tuhan mau aku setia melakukannya… yg aku percaya God will never forsake me! Tuhan itu Allah yg ga pernah ingkar janji dan firmanNya ga pernah bohong!

Selain soal “nanti2kan” Dia, dr kmrn aku dpt message yg sama soal “sblm km minta Tuhan fulfill your desires, km sndr hrs tau jelas dulu desires km itu apa”… nah sempet kepkr takutnya nanti malah asik sendiri sama desires, plans, expectations kita.. pas ga terjd nt jd kecewa… Tp ternyata diingetin org yg dekat sama Tuhan akan membagi hatinya dgn Tuhan dan Tuhan sndr pun akan membagi isi hatiNya ke kita… “Tuhan bergaul karib dengan org yg takut akan Dia, dan perjanjian-Nya diberitahukan-Nya kpd mrk” ~ Mazmur 25:14~… Desires kita itu akan terus di-align sama desiresnya Tuhan… aku ga bs percaya sama hatiku sndr krn Jeremiah blg hati kita itu menipu, tp aku bs percaya sama perkataan dan tuntunan Roh KudusNya yg tau isi hati Tuhan sndr dan krn Dia tinggal di dlmku maka aku pun bs tau isi hatiNya kalo aku senantiasa bersekutu dgnNya…

Nah, jdnya aku nanya deh ke diri sndr, aku sendiri maunya apa? Soal usaha ini, apa aku msh mau lanjutin? Honestly and personally speaking aku msh mau… Tp aku gatau caranya gimana dgn segala tantangan dan pergumulan yg ada… Brsn pas aku baca another email devotional, ada tlsnya gini, “It’s not over till God says it’s over. Circumstances and people don’t have the last word, God does!”

Nah.. skrg ini jdnya ya aku minta hikmat ke Tuhan utk bisa memahami situasi yg aku sdg hadapi saat ini apakah berarti Tuhan udah blg “No” atau hanya halangan yg berusaha menguji desire dr Tuhan?

Aku blm tau…

Anyway, sharing-nya jd udah lumayan panjang.. Sampe disini dl aja deh ya. Nulisnya lagi buru2 jdnya pake indo aja hehe.. GBU and once again happy new year yaaaa…

“Rather than making a year resolution, let’s just do it one step at a time, let’s make it as a DAILY RESOLUTION for 2010 forward: it is TO BE LIKE JESUS. While He was on earth, Jesus loved, served and gave glory to God.

When we resolve to live that way, we will find that everyday brings a new adventure”

Big Dream in Little Me…

Sitting on the couch reading “The Little Red Writing Book” by Mark Tredinnick that I’ve just bought from Borders inspires me a bit to update my blog at the moment…

I still haven’t forgotten my dream yet, to write a book one day, hoping that ‘one day’ will be coming true this year! (or at least for the next 2 years ).. and after I get stucked with my novel writing recently (huhuhuhuhu) I’ve found another idea to compile my blog entries that I’ve been writing since the year 2005 into a book.. how that sounds?

I was inspired by Pastor Ayub Yahya’s book “Titik Nol”-one that my cousin gave me before I left to Melbourne, in which it contains his blog entries for about one and a half years.. I’ve read several first pages, the topic revolves around his activities and observations as a pastor in GKI (one of church denominations in Indo)…

So yeah, I am inspired to do similar thing… although I am still not sure whether to write it all in English or Indo… I’ve just got this plan to open up my old archives since 2005 in my Friendster blog, start choosing which entries I want to put those in, editing it (it’d be more difficult if I decided to be in English-all correct grammar without being too rigid, ideally I want the writings ”to play a melody” when I and the readers read it-relate to what Tredinnick wrote, “Good writing should sound like the very best of talking; clear, careful, animated, and memorable. Good writing means something fast. It speaks. Sometimes it even sings“)..

Well, I believe, if this dream truly comes from the Lord, He will be the One who provides me the way, His Spirit will be the One who keeps inspiring me, guiding me to write things what’s in His own heart…

Thank You Jesus… nite niteee

Let the Faith Speaks!

As this morning I sit holding my pen with empty papers from my journal staring at me, I pour out my heart to God… Could I be facing a situation like Noah?

You know, God asked him to build an ark, warning him a big flood would destroy the earth in due time… But there wasn’t even any rain yet! Yet he obeyed. He prepared all, he built it, regardless all people in town ridiculed him, mocking him. He just focused on what God has put in his heart. This one purpose, one desire: to build an ark with the measurements as what the Lord instructed.

Well, I don’t really know when the bible wrote “So God said to Noah…” (Gen 6:13-21).. in what way did God speak to Noah? Did He speak audibly? Showing His manifested presence to Noah in a form of thick clouds, fire, and there was a sound telling him what to do from it? But then the bible clearly said, “Noah did everything just as God commanded him” (Gen 6:22).

 

So, when I and my bf have this desire to go back to Indo, “restart” our life, building our happy family there, seeing Indo as a field where we can sow seeds for God’s kingdom and in due time, reaping the harvest as well-yet most of people whom I’ve told this plan saying to me, “what for? are you seriously want to leave your descent job and life here, and start all over again in Indo?”, I don’t really know whether we are facing the same situation as Noah did at his time…

 

God do not speak audibly to us, yet we have this desire in our heart. I also remember the messages I’ve been getting throughout the past months, “just believe!”… human, yes that includes me, tend to use their mind and brain more than what we require… let the faith speaks!

Well, the conclusion for this morning is, I just believe somehow God will speak more about this matter…

He will share His heart to us whenever we are willing to seek Him… Based on my past experiences, He never leave me in uncertainty… He always give me the answer, all answer is in His Son, Jesus Christ… in a time that is never too late, never too early… I just have a faith on that…

Then He put this song of praise in my lips to sing and adore Him:

“Apa yg tak pernah dilihat mata,

yg tak pernah didengar telinga,

yg tak pernah timbul di dlm hati,

smua disediakan, bagi yg mengasihi Dia.

Allah sanggup melakukan segala perkara,

dulu, skarang, dan slamanya,

kuasaNya tdk berubah,

 

Allah sanggup melakukan segala perkara,

dulu, skarang, dan slamanya,

kuasaNya tak berubah”

 

This song is inspired by God’s own words in 1 Corinthians 2:9

“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived

what God has prepared for those who love Him”

 

This morning, this is what He speaks to me… and I believe, yes, I believe… He is faithful to His words…

“Panggilan Tuhan”

Hoaaaa… ternyata terakhir kali nulis di blog ini udah April!! Busettt.. udah lama bangettt >.< time fliesssss…!!
Excited sih udah masuk June, "semester pertama" 2009 udah lewat (critanya msh jaman kuliahan hehehe)… I believe God is preparing something bigger for the rest of the year! Semester ke-2 nilainya pasti akan lebih baik lg dr yg pertama! (nilai kehidupan yg bisa aku peroleh dan belajar mksdnya.. ciehhh ).. aminnn…

Bbrp hari ini Tuhan lagi sering ngomong soal janji Tuhan dan penggenapannya nih… Dibilang suruh tunggu “the appointed time”, His time, His Kairos… Ternyata Tuhan ingetin aku spy aku ga lupa sama janjinya Tuhan… n aku bersyukur banget, Tuhan yg mau kasih kado kok jd Dia yg ingetin aku supaya ‘nagih’ kadonya ke Dia… hehehe…
Sebenernya ada 3 hal sih yg paling banyak mengkonsumsi pikiran aku… 2 hal pertama dirahasiakan aja yah huehehe… yg ke-3 ini berhubungan sama keinginan aku utk mengetahui panggilan hidup aku yg seutuhnya dan menjalaninya…

Tau kan kalian, kl semua org jg ingin hidupnya berguna… Nah baru2 ini aku juga dpt conviction lg kl tujuan hidup aku itu intinya cuma satu: memuliakan nama Tuhan, to glorify His name, to give my life as a living sacrifice for Jesus Christ, the Lord… Kalo pun aku sukses jd wanita karir, kaya raya, berhasil, kalo semua itu bukan ditujukan utk kemuliaan Tuhan, maka sama aja hidup aku ga bakal berasa ‘pas’… pasti msh trs ada yg kurang… krn inner satisfaction dlm hati aku itu hrs dipenuhi, n I believe it is God…
Dia yg udah ciptaiin aku dgn tujuan menyenangkan hatiNya…

Sama kalo misalnya aku membuat suatu karya yg bagus, misalnya aja sebuah lukisan… Selama proses pembuatannya aku enjoy, pas udah jadi pun aku sangat menikmati looking at the painting at all time whenever possible, krn aku tau I’m the one who paint it, I am the creator…
Sama juga sama Tuhan yg udah ciptaiin aku pun begitu, He delights in me, and that is truth yg sangat berharga, ga semua org bisa yakin Tuhan itu delight in them… n ini butuh hati yg terbuka dan kasih Tuhan ijin buat berkerja dlm hati mrk itu utk mrk juga bisa dpt conviction yg sama dlm hati mrk…

Nah, stlh Tuhan ingetin lagi tujuan utama hidup aku itu utk menyenangkan Dia (above all my personal ambitions), tentu aku pengen tau dalam hal khusus spt apa aku bisa menyenangkan Dia, apa panggilan hidup aku sebenarnya… and I tell you, this is a process yg bs exciting, bs juga jd bikin stress sendiri kl ga bener cara nanganinnya (berdasarkan pengalaman hehe…)

Stlh malam ini aku hbs baca bukunya Iin Tjipto “Panggilan Tuhan” yg br aku beli di seminarnya Yusak Tjipto di Balai Samudera Kelapa Gading tadi, aku ngerti bbrp hal:

1. Panggilan itu beda sama perkerjaan.

Org yg menganggap sesuatu yg dia kerjakan sebagai panggilan Tuhan, dia bakal ngerjain itu dgn sukacita dan sukarela. Instead of expecting dibayar, mrk yg justru bayar harga spy bisa memenuhi panggilan itu…
Jd misalnya kalo di gereja aku skrg pelayanan jd singer, kl aku menganggap itu sebagai perkerjaan aku, aku bakal nuntut acknowledgment, praise, atau ‘bayaran’ lainnya utk satifsy my own self. Tp kl aku ngerti itu panggilan Tuhan, aku justru yg akan dgn senang hati memberikan diriku semasa aku bisa memberkati org lain lwt hal yg aku bisa lakukan ini, yg sbnrnya juga kemampuannya diksh dari Tuhan sebagai semata-mata kasih karunia…

2. Org yg tdk menemukan panggilannya akan selalu membandingkan dirinya dgn org lain

Dia ga akan merasa puas kalo liat org lain kok kerjaanya begitu sdgkan aku cuma begini, dan berbagai macam keluhan lainnya. Nah dlm hal ini juga nih aku ditegur. Seringkali aku ngerasa aku ini agak-agak ga berguna hanya krn liat org lain kok lbh sukses n keliatannya lbh dipake sama Tuhan lewat kesaksian hidup yg bisa dia bagi mengenai kesuksesannya itu… Malam ini aku ditegur dan diajar, aku memiliki suatu panggilan yg khusus, yg unik dari Tuhan, dan bukan aku yg mengaturnya, tapi Tuhan.
Dengan banding2in sama org lain aku bs kehilangan fokus, kehilangan sukacita, bahkan kehilangan panggilan Tuhan yg udah secara khusus Tuhan ksh buat aku… bahaya loh kl sikap hati kaya gini ga dgn cepat aku rubah.. Makanya makasih banget buat Tuhan udah ingetin aku lewat bukunya Iin Tjipto mlm ini…

3. Org yg ga menerima panggilan ato ga mengenali panggilan Tuhan buat diri mrk, cenderung menghakimi org lain.
Alasannya? Mrk terlalu kebanyakkan waktu alias menganggur. Krn ga berusaha utk mengenal panggilan dlm hidup mrk, mrk jdnya sibuk melihat ke luar, ke mana aja deh pokoknya asal bukan liat ke dalam diri sendiri.

Ini 3 lessons di antara sekian banyaknya aku belajar mlm ini lwt buku yg aku baca…
Ini jg mepet banget sih sbnrnya udah mau tidur, tp pengen banget pikiranku dituang ke dlm bentuk tulisan, jdnya mlm2 pun yaudah deh online aja.. tdnya bahkan mau update dr BB aja tanpa hrs repot2 nyalaiin laptop, tp ternyata susah bo haha..

Hmmm.. sekian dl deh… bsk disambung lg crita2nya

God bless you all!