Just went back home after having a little adventure with Aimee, that is to walk to a nearby playground that I plan to bring Aimee on this Friday. Apparently it is only less than 10 minutes walk. When I had a peek through, I saw three much older mommies accompanying their kids and they’re all Australian. Is it ok if I say honestly that I feel a little bit “intimidated”…? It will be a different group of mommies probably with the one on Friday, but just in case if the mommies there were also much older and are native, will I look… ‘very different’ to them…?
Yes, this little young non-native mommy here is nervous being in a new environment, new neighbourhood (a zebra amidst uhmm.. lions? :P)… Last Saturday an older Indian mother that I met was very surprised when she saw me as the mother to Aimee (Aimee was playing with her 3-years old kid). I still can recall the image of her two dilated eyes when she saw me (my friend who saw her reaction also thought that she was too exaggerating :P). She asked how old I was, and when I mentioned ’30’, she was truly surprised and thought she was mistaken to hear between ’13’ and ’30’ huahahaha… (come onnn… am I really that young) 😛
But yeah, I know, I also have nothing to lose to bring Aimee on this Friday to that playground, and it is for Aimee anyway, it is about her, not about me 🙂 and I have brought this to my prayer too, I know the Lord will direct my path and grant me His wisdom 🙂
“Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity” – 1 Timothy 4:12 (NIV)
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline” – 2 Timothy 1:7 (NLT)
Have you experienced similar situation, feeling nervous wanting to blend in with your surrounding community (as a mother or just a ‘social human being’)? 🙂
Anyway, I enjoy the evening walk, the bright blue sky, the brief intimate moment I could have with Him while pushing the pram… These are all privilege, things that I barely can enjoy when I was still in Jakarta. So, thank You Lord for that moment and everything 🙂