“Keeping Up with CrunchyNat”

I can’t believe the last time I updated my blog was last year July! 😱

I still continue writing almost everyday though, either on my journal or on my Instagram as a “micro blog post” @CrunchyNat (under hashtag #crunchynatsjournal). I guess writing to let out what’s in my heart has been a major part of my daily life, of what makes me “me” since many many years ago (hello Year-6 Nat 👋😋). Writing on Instagram with limited words limit also assists me to “keep it short and simple; to the point”, otherwise I’d be babbling a lot more words…. like what I am doing atm 😃

OK, back to my intention to keeping you updated with how my life is now….

Many, many things and occurrences have happened since July last year…

And you know the first thing that comes up to my mind which I’d like to share with you; the major thing which, sadly, not so much about happy news at all, is I lost my beloved mum on December 12th 2019.

Months before that when she was sick have been the toughest months in my life, and those days after losing her were the most saddest days in my life….

Yes my life has had many heartaches, but nothing compared with those days…. the pain, the hurt, the loss…

I have written quite many posts about my feelings during this period on Instagram, and that helped. It helps to not keeping the sadness to myself, it helps to record this grieving journey in words. Although to this date I still “refuse” to look at my “treasure box” filled with her pictures and her things (which I managed to bring back here after her funeral in Indonesia)…

Where there is great sadness, there is also greater grace.

This is what I have experienced through this trial….

If it wasn’t because of God’s words and His assuring presence, I wouldn’t be where I am now, and I wouldn’t be able to endure all the emotional pains this “well”…

This has indeed brought me to another level of relationship with Him, another dimension that I’ve never experienced before, a deeper bond, a greater trust in His loving goodness…

Some days are still hard, and the loss will always remain as a scar in my heart I suppose… It’ll never go disappear… and to His immense grace I will cling my hope onto.

— Moving on to another update…

I have started working full time since October last year. This is my first full-time job after 7 years!! Yes, in between those years I managed to work part-time when I was pregnant with Arielle at a small take-away sandwich place nearby. I also earned some “pocket money” through my arts-making. Nonetheless, to have a “proper” job after those so many years felt surreal… felt like those 7-years were like just “months or a year ago” 😮 Yes, that’s how fast time in my life has flown away…

Things that are so much different compared with my previous corporate working experience 7 years ago: hello flexibility to work from home, hi online meetings (Webex, Zoom, Microsoft Teams) – haha!

I am so grateful many years ago when Aimee was still 3 years old, God has begun to teach me a lot about finding my worth and security in Him alone, and not resting them upon “my capability to earn money” (#tbt to this post I wrote back then “What Success is (For Me)”-2015). It’s like setting my heart right and building a strong foundation for this new season, God is awesome indeed!

This question came to my mind several times during the last year or two (when Arielle has passed her “babyhood” period), “when would be the right time for me to be back working full time again?“. Amazingly, I’d always have this peace and assurance inside my heart that I have nothing to worry about, “when the time comes, He’ll provide“. Until this season arrived, I’m happy to be extra wise with my lifestyle and spending budget (and need to always keep this in my mind, as a “wise steward” being entrusted with God’s blessings) .

He has proven just one more time (again and again) that He is faithful, He will never fail me, and His timing is always the best! 🙌

— Last necessary update (for now)…. is the major situation happening around the world at the moment… that staying home is actually saving lives…

This is my third week working from home. Many adjustments (not only limitation in our movement and social life, but also some new realities that my mind is “forced” to see, and accept).

Life is not getting any easier, right.

I’m planning to write my experience related with that last update in a different post.

Random Art Made by Yours Truly 😊

Last but not least, thank you so much for reading this… if you’d like to drop one or two words (or more) in the comment is always welcomed.

I hope you are all staying safe and well too, and keep your hope lights up no matter how hard and tough some days are… whenever there is hope (and faith), there will always be that affirmation that the dark cloud won’t always be there, clear sky and sunshine WILL one day come!

God bless you all 😊💕