I made this art couple of months ago, because I admitted that this was true. “A family that PRAYS together, STAYS together”.
However, every now and then I (we) often let ourselves catched off-guard; fence down and weeds reappear. We “forget” every now and then about #UNITY in #marriage.
It is not about our own (too little) kingdom, but it’s about God’s kingdom on earth.
Then when conflict arised, we weren’t prepared. By then it felt like it was “too late”.
Yesterday I had a talk with my close friend/cousin/sister #thebest about this topic, I told her I don’t want to pray out of fear as the result. You know, fear that “if I didn’t pray, things will get chaotic“.
I believe this isn’t the right motive and the correct heart condition to pray. And it soothed my soul that she understands! She knows and experiences the same thing (the beauty of sisterhood in Christ).
This morning then His Spirit reminds me this verse:
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity,
but of POWER, LOVE, and SELF-DISCIPLINE” (2 Tim 1:7).
I can, CAN, pray not out of fear – because His Spirit enables me to!
Praying out of flesh will result in burn out, praying in spirit will take me to higher places with Him.
This morning I choose to reject the lies and intimidation,
This morning I choose to listen to the Shepherd’s voice.
He knows my name, and I belong to Him.
I will keep praying and become the “pillar of prayer” for this family #istriadalahtiangdoa
I will not complain and asking God (again), “why me? why do I have to be the one who prays?”. I know now that the Lord is reassuring and reconfirming me once again, to pray is my calling. I am called first and above all as an intercessor. Not in the church, not in my cell group – but firstly at my home! Just between me and Him, beneath the silent walls of my home.
When later I get weary, I shall take rest in Him, again and again.
“This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it” – Isaiah 30:15
“Finding a house is as much difficult as finding a soul mate” – Natalia Wijaya
Which one is The One?
Yes, it is my personal comment based on my experiences lately, feel like been riding an up-and-down emotional rollercoaster. For a little bit of background, you may want to read my earlier post in November 2012 “Wedding Anniversary Gift from the Lord” about my testimony of how I can end up being here in Melbourne 🙂
In Jakarta both of us had to work and might be difficult for us to have much saving yet at least we have had our own apartment. Here, I can enjoy the privilege of taking care of Aimee by myself and we personally feel we can enjoy much better value-for-money entertainment and living standard in Melbourne but we don’t own a house. We have known it’d be a huge challenge for us once we moved here. Yet as we walked along through God’s opened doors, I’d always proclaim my faith “if God brings us here, He will not work half way. He will provide for us everything including a house of our own“, and how much I want to trust Him in a difficult situation like now.
We have just had an experience close to agreeing to buy a house & land package from one developer (we have put a deposit to show our interest in securing the land and have met their finance staff to discuss our loan options-for us that is very close in tying our knot to either the right or wrong path) – before then we decided not to proceed, just tonight.
Before then, I have to ‘suffer’ from the dilemmas and “what if” questions, enough to making me not be able to sleep well. The process made me emotionally tired, as I was really confused waiting for God’s answer whether that house was ‘the one’ or not, it was a thin line between we moved by our own wills or God’s wills.
So, my statement above (making the process in finding a house to be very much similar with the process I had to go through before I decided to be with my now husband), is based on the following circumstances 😛
1. You can’t always tell whether ‘it’ (as in ‘the house’) or ‘your spouse’ (he/she) is the one from the first encounter
Some people were lucky if they could, and I used to hope I could have that “instinct” or probing from Holy Spirit too when I first met my husband, but “sadly” it wasn’t that easy for me. However, as my journey in finding a house still continues, I hope I can!! (I dunno, maybe within the first minutes we talk to the agent, or within first seconds entering the house (if it’s a second). By the way, you are welcomed to visit my other blog to read the story of how I met my husband 😛 *blush*
2. Better to suffer heartbreaking moments before you move into a more serious relationship (as for the house, before you sign any contract. As in term of relationship, personally for me before you even agree to be his/her girlfriend/boyfriend. But of course what is more vital is, before you say that “I DO” 🙂 )
It is disappointing indeed for me when we finally decided not to proceed with the house as we had given our time and effort (plus that emotional burden by having that sort of dilemma), as much disappointing and hurtful as to be in a close relationship with someone but then turns out things don’t work out between you two, but hey, it is truly better to withdraw now than later when it’s too late!
3. May have to undergo a “wide array of selection” before you eventually meet the right one
These paragraphs I quote from my other blog about how I met my husband desribe it best haha…
“October 5th 2008 – That day he finally told me he wanted to be closer to me more than just a friend. I couldn’t remember whether I was happy or surprised, back then I didn’t know what to expect. That wasn’t the first time a man told me his feeling and asked me to be his girlfriend, it has happened many times before. For some I agreed to give a think and pray for a decision within a certain period (always ended up for ‘No’), while for the rest I just straightforwardly knew the answer would also be ‘No’.
For this one?
I didn’t know what I should answer and do. A part inside my heart said, “Ah, not again, the ‘cycle’ is happening again! Maybe it’d be just like the others, for not more than a month later the answer eventually would be a ‘No’.
But on that night somehow I just found that God was my hiding place. I didn’t know what I should pray or ask to God related with this issue. I just knew He would be the place where I could find the answer and He would guide me in making the decision”.
Reminder for myself: do not give up in finding my future ‘anointed house’!!!
Same principle applies in finding the dream house 😛
4. Both requires HUGE leap of faith
Sure you may have liked what you see (“the offer, deal, house type” vs. “the person’s character, background”) but you are not able to find out “the real it/him/her” unless you make that first step, a huge step of faith that is. Would there be something wrong in the house which might be only found out after we move into it? Would I be able to accept his/her weaknesses which may arise later when we are into a more serious relationship? Would he/she change after we get married? etc etc
5. It is very rare to get 10 out of 10 from your “perfect house/spouse list” all’s checked, necessary adjustment has to be made as long as it does not overrule your most important value or principle
I used to write a list for my ‘future dream husband’ (knowing what your criteria is helping you a lot in deciding one from the “wide array of selection” I’m talking about at above. I forgot the complete list already and only remember the ‘important parts’, it was written in one of my diaries stored in my parents’ house in Jakarta) and my husband scored 7 out of 10 hahaha… Now when he annoys me, I tend to focus more on those 3 that he’s lack of and forgetting the other 7!! *ups* 😛 But on our ‘high’, I know I am with him for right reasons and he scored all the ‘3 very principle things that my future husband should have’ lol :-*
6. Don’t go for it at the first hand if you have known the house/he/she is “just not for you“
We have set a certain budget and we won’t make ourselves a fool by approaching a house that is way exceeding the budget range, we won’t even ask for more information from the agent, why would we waste our time and energy finding for more information for something that we cannot afford even though how beautiful the house may seem? For me before I was with my husband, this verse is my ‘limit’: “Don’t become partners with those who reject God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That’s not partnership; that’s war. Is light best friends with dark?” (2 Corinthians 6:14) and I used to bear in my mind, “not all Christians are Christ-followers” 🙂
Well… maybe I can add some other points for the comparison, but I gotta go to sleep 🙂 After making that decision of letting it go, we both are more relieved now…. God may have saved us from a huge mistake… I know, because now I can sleep well again and I can feel that peace in my heart, at least I can save that dilemma for another time (still hoping we will get that hunch when we meet our future house!!) and back to the basic: “if God brings us here, He will not work half way. He will provide for us everything including a house of our own” I proclaim that God won’t fail us!
Have any encouraging stories or comments related with my story? 🙂
I’ve been arriving in Melbourne since the 15th, and is very grateful that now I am here, and Christmas this year feels so different.. More contentment in my heart. Being away from my family is better I guess… sometimes distance is necessary in a relationship, even with your loved ones… days before my parents were back to Jakarta, somehow God showed me a revelation which unburdened my heavy loads for years about my disappointment toward the circumstances in my family… That my parents actually love me. It’s just because life circumstances in Jakarta that make them ‘unpurposely’ did things that hurt my heart… It is simple, yet very relieving… and I don’t know why I couldn’t accept it while I was still in Indo… 5 days where they were with me, my hubby, and Aimee gave that revelation… and I could only give thanks to God. Not being able to see the daily reality in Indo is better, particularly during certain festive occassions such as this Christmas. I will never stop praying for them, my faith tells me one day they will be changed, they will.It will be one day of God’s appointed time.
Today’s Christmas message which was taken from the history of how the birth of Jesus fulfilled the prophet’s revelations which were proclaimed 700 years before Jesus actually was born, tells me that God does work in all things in our life, things that may seem like naturally happen, or sometimes could be supernaturally like how the virgin Mary could carry the baby in her womb by the power and miracle of the Holy Spirit. But mostly, through all natural things happen in our life, never underestimate them. They may seem happen like ‘the way they suppose to’, but God works behind all of those to do good for all of us who love Him (Romans 8:28).
Just like the Bible tells about how history begins, let our life becomes His story.
Entering the new year, don’t ask “what should I do with my life? what are my dreams? what are my future plans?”. Instead, ask “what God wants to do with my life? what dreams God wants me to have? what future plans God wants me to concieve?”
I’ve forgotten that life is God-centered, and is never about myself.
This Christmas season the Holy Spirit reminds me, to return to what my true life purpose is. My life is for Him alone, for His glory, His kingdom. He works through all my weaknesses and errors, He transforms it for an even greater miracle and testimony.
Thank You Jesus.
Happy Birthday, I’m very proud that the whole world celebrates Your birthday. One day those who only celebrate it with god cause and presents will understand that Christmas is only about Your story and never about themselves.
Seneng bangetttt td habis ngerayaiin Christmas celebration di City Tower 😀 Baru 6 bulan aku tinggalin tp pas nginjeknya lg langsung udah berasa kangen bangettt… and I am really happy for all the people who give me a very warm welcome!!! Much warmer than I ever thought or could expect!!! This has made me missing this church even more… Habis itu jg langsung dijadwal singer buat awal Jan ma kak sher hahaha… Seneng banget… Tuhan bae banget Dia sediaiin dua gereja yg menurutku the best church in each of the country God put me: City Tower (TCT) di Indo and BIC di Melb.. How I am so blessed by these churches!
Aku mereka-reka sih rencana Tuhan yg lbh lanjut buat aku di Melb tuh maksudnya apa… Aku rindu banget buat melayani di Indo, at my own homeland… tp ternyata skrg ini it seems like God’s calling me again to stay in Melb yg gatau smp kpn utk saat ini… Sebagaimanapun aku rindu utk plg ke Indo, God has given me responsibilities and other desires too di Melb…
Well, utk saat ini pokoknya aku hny mau ngikutin panggilannya Tuhan… make myself be available for Him fully… setia ngikutin guidance-nya Tuhan.. krn apa yg Dia rencanaiin buat aku itu yg terbaik… I trust in You, Lord…
Niwei, bahasanya mix gini tolong dimaklumin yah.. udah malem, ngantuk, seharian dr pagi pergi (total dr jam 8 pagi n br plg td jam 9.30 malam hahaha).. Thank You so much Lord for this wonderful day… 🙂
How many are you shocked over Michael Jackson’s death compared to the bomb blast that once again struck our lovely city, Jakarta, on this Friday morning? How many are you thinking of MU’s arrival more, hoping they won’t cancel their visit?
How many are you being indifferent?
I was so shocked and disappointed to hear the news firstly from Facebook’s status updates of my friends in Indo not long ago… I can’t help not to ask “Why, Lord?”… I was angry, disappointed, and sad, over the actors behind all of this madness… Why don’t you love your own country??!! It may be much better if we were attacked by some foreigners trying to invade us, yet the actors I believe are Indonesians too! You are an Indonesian yet you don’t love your own country…!
Speaking of language terms, we often refer a nation as a “mother”… so technically speaking, why you ruin your own “mother”????? Why you want to destruct her, embarassed her in front of the public…?
I myself do not know I would be this sad and disappointed over this issue… I cried! This is smt unfamiliar for me to be honest… But I guess God answers my prayer! When I was still in Indo, I remember the hairdresser whom I went shared with me revelation that Iin Cipto (one of Indonesian’s evangelists) received… About how God is willing for 5 % of Christians Indonesians to pray over their own nation… Just 5%! Which is around 2 millions from the total population…
The same like what Abraham tried to deal with God in order to save Sodom (Gen 18), which is to find at least 50 persons in that city who fear the Lord… and Abraham continued to bargain, it was down until ten, but then there was even not 10 people in that city who loved God! I don’t want the same tragic happen to this country at this age…
I know the major population of this country is Moslem, yet I am sure there are still many Christians who really love this country, willing to pray for its wellness (and I don’t deny there are some part of Moslem dedicated to pray for our country as well).. We share same nation, we share same land, we should share the same love… more than just a nationality written in our passport…
So when my hairdresser shared that to me, I commit within my own heart, that I want to be a part of that 5% Christians Indonesians who pray for this country, standing on behalf, asking for God’s grace and mercy… And just last week I prayed to God asking for a heart that has a sense of belonging for this nation…
If I didn’t treat Indonesia as my own, I wouldn’t even care to pray for it… I care for my own stuffs, my books, my CDs.. If I lose one of those, I would definitely spend some time searching for it until I find it… I care for my loved ones, if they were sick, I would definitely visit them, taking first of all actions: praying for their wellness… And I long for this same act to be applied to my own country too!
So, God has answered my prayer… when this country hurt, I am hurt…
God, please heal the wound… I know You still have divine plan and noone can interfere with Your sovereignity… What some people plan for the evil, You are able to turn it to goodness… Please pour out your love over the people of this country… I know You forgive and love those who’ve been wrong too… Touch them, God… We pray for Your miracles…
Let’s bring our “mother” to our prayer… She belongs to us, we belong to her… There is a reason why the Lord created us as an Indonesian… Take our portion in it…
Most especially for all Indonesians out there…
My Thoughts... My Life... 